Briefly, A Delicious Life (musings)

A Slut by any other name

Ever since 'sex worker' has been introduced to the mainstream public as an umbrella term for the people in my industry, I've had clients ask me if that is what I call myself and prefer to be referred to going forward.

With no disrespect to the sex work advocates who have fought and continue to fight for the rights of sex workers everywhere - I'm from a different generation. When I was growing up, all sex workers were commonly referred to as prostitutes. Those who worked the streets or in brothels were usually called hookers, if you worked for an agency and met your clients in fancy hotels, you were an escort or callgirl. If you happened to be the mistress of influential men in previous centuries, that would have made you a courtesan, or (my favorite) grande horizontale. Personally, I don't have an issue with any of these terms including the ones who are considered denigrating. The offense is not in the name but in the mind of the person who uses it with the intend to insult.

Refer to me as a tart, think of me as a slut as you beat off to the image of my wet pussy, call me a dirty whore as we both hang from the chandelier - as long as you do it as a gentleman client: honor my rate and respect my boundaries with minty breath and washed bum, we are good :)

Don't be like Fred

Every working girl has a cautionary tale.

Appreciation

Hard to imagine it has only been a few short months since I hung up my little shingle. The response to it has been overwhelmingly positive. People reached out just to say hi and that they liked what they saw, some offered constructive criticism, some shared their own story and why the words and imagery resonated with them, all of which I welcome and appreciate. Life is about connection and I have been fortunate enough to have met some terrific individuals. The pleasures shared, thoughts exchanged, the generosity of spirit at the base of this endeavor, opening up to a complete stranger about your deepest fantasies, turning off that brain and just feel, enjoy, indulge, exult. It's been a divine experience.

Hanami 2025

How mature is mature?

I've been contemplating advertising as a 'mature escort'. At 38 years of age, I am closer to 40 than 30. Escorting is perceived to be a young woman's game, so I feel it's worth pointing out, in case you came here expecting some- one in their early 20s. In advertising, 'mature' essentially means middle aged, an age that according to Wikipedia spans the range from age 45 to 65. Being Asian, most people guess me to be 10 years younger. So, my problem is, I started off worrying that people might find me older than what they expected, if I don't apply the label, and ended up worrying that, once I do, those who come explicitly in search of a middle aged escort might not find me mature enough for their taste. Thoughts?

Finish the sentence

The last time I cried ... over a line from My Beloved Monster by Caleb Carr.

The last time I pissed myself laughing ... over the pages long made-to-order porn video commission screenplay chapter in Tony Tulathimutte's Rejection.

If I won the lottery ... nothing much would change, I'm already living life the way I want to live.

Keep it simple, Susan

(by Lyndsay Rush)

When I hold the word success under a blacklight
what glows back at me is ease and freedom
Not Scrooge-McDuck-esque vaults of swimmable gold
Not clout or fame or for The Joneses to eat my dust
Just 9–10 hours of sleep
Work that feels like play
And terms and conditions that I write myself.

The key to a good life is ... don't covet other people's lives (and stay the fuck away from social media).

The greatest pleasures ... are the simplest ones: making do with what you have and can afford. Like a sandwich.

My pet peeve ... is any online submission form where I have to click myself from 2025 back to the month and year of my birth. MANUALLY. IN MONTHS.

My favorite quote to live by is ... Never look back and think, I could have eaten this!

My favorite place to be on a Saturday night is ... home alone, tacos or pizza, ice cream with extra dollop cream or spray whip, something interesting on the telly (zapping channels like in the 90s, no streaming services here).

My favorite thing to do on a Sunday arvo ... I try to get all my shopping done on Saturday, so Sunday is just for browsing the market, walking around the city taking pictures of things I haven't noticed before, if it's a nice day and everyone is out and about, I like that special atmosphere, that feeling of all is right in the world, no fighting, no stress, everyone just having a good time, enjoying food or just a coffee.

I try to live ... as slowly as possible.

Pay What You Can (not what you want) - A thought experiment

I once ate at a pay-what-you-can cafe. Since then, the idea got stuck in my head.

My best friend's dry response: "It's either going to be massively successful or absolutely disastrous."

I get where the disaster part comes in. People will think I'm a fraud and this is all a scam. People will try to take advantage. People will think I'm bonkers.

Pricing is the most crucial aspect in any business. Fees are set to customer perception, market positioning and competitiveness. Providers go high or low according to their branding and their desired target demographic.

My target customer is someone who I feel lucky to have come across, and vice versa.

I'm in the business of serendipity, of being in the right place at the right time for the right person. I'm sorry if it sounds cringy, I don't mean it in a sappy romance epic kind of way. I'm saying, we are two strangers who found each other across the internet and we happen to click and have a fabulous time not because we are perfect but because we just happen to be right for each other in that moment, in that mood. For that to happen, the stars have to be truly in alignment. Or as the Taylor Swift song goes, It was rare, I was there....

How do you set a pricing strategy for making delightful chance discoveries? You can't really.

All you can do is put yourself out there and be open to what comes your way. Life has a way of working out. The important lesson I learned is to not get in the way. I want to leave that room with a smile on my face as much as you do. I don't have any new year's resolutions for 2025, but a new year always carries a notion of a clean slate, of new beginnings. So why not cast away the doubts and do the radical thing: take a chance and see what happens?

It's not that big of a step. With my regulars, we hardly talk numbers anymore anyway. They take care of me, I take care of them. I prefer it that way. The gift is in the giving.

Honesty boxes have been around for ages and they work (for the most part) because people are fair-minded (for the most part). Or at least, they see the point of why doing the right thing is the right thing to do.

This industry has a way of stripping your notion of common decency due to the numbers of bad actors one runs into on both sides of the aisle. People get burned, and with each bad experience, a bit more trust and goodwill goes down the drain and we are all poorer for it. But walking around expecting the worst of people is no way to live. Sometimes, trust has to be advanced to make a go of it.

"In an age of irony, the deepest subversion is to be sincere." Let's break some eggs?

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